Friday, April 9, 2010

This Isn't About Nike

Okay. I have only one pair of rubber shoes, which I bought on sale. If it weren't, I wouldn't have spent a single cent for it. I used it only a couple of times. That was when I was hooked up with trying to allow my lymphatic system work better by playing badminton.

I hate strenuous activities. I hate the gym. I hate running. You'd see me pout if you ask me to walk a few blocks. That's why I don't care having just a pair of rubber shoes.

I hate running. But it's something I'm quite good at. Not that I've won a marathon or something. But if there were such an award for it, I must have had that gold medal by now. Alright. Not that I'm proud of it either.

It's as if I have this personal invisible alarm that goes wild when it sees danger. As I look back, I see how many times I heeded to this alarm and walked away...ran away. And the endings weren't always good. I had to deal with a long process of healing. But come to think of it, most of those wounds are not completely healed yet. They just remain untouched for a while, and the moment my personal invisible alarm sends me that familiar signal again, even the slightest touch open up the old wounds and I can't help but

And it's just exhausting.

Oh how I wanted to end this blog with that last sentence. But I can't. Not without writing what he told me while I'm occupied by this running thing.

When you run away from something, you have to have something to turn onto. You can't just run away towards nothingness, unless you want to be stuck and lost for the rest of your life.

At some degree, we all do run away. The question is, to where? To whom? Most of the time and even unknowingly, we are desperate to get the security we always need, to get some questions answered, to just rest. But only when we run to an unchanging God and allow his love to carry us through the fears and uncertainties could we ever cross our finish line.

Is it okay to run away? Maybe. As long as we're heading to the right direction.

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